Our hearts grow dark. Our eyes grow dim. We see nothing except the dense darkness. No one seems to be on our side. Everything seems to be against us. We feel abandoned and lonely; even our dear and near God has deserted us; our hearts are shattered like a dry weary land. We begin to cry aloud, “The Lord has forsaken me, my Lord has forgotten” (Isa. 49:14).
“He finds, says St. Alphonsus …only darkness and fear, and it seems to him that all is lost. He prays he turns to God for help and it seems as if God has become deaf to his pleading” (The Love of God in Practice). We find ourselves restless and desolated. We are engrossed in darkness and our hearts begin to run dry.
Can God really forget us? No! Even if we forget Him, God will never and ever forget us. “Can a woman forget her nursing child or show no compassion for the child of her womb? Yet I will not forget you” (Isa. 49:15). We feel abandoned because we don’t see God. Our hearts are gloomy that we cannot recognize the light shining within us. God is always with us. He never leaves us. Then why don’t we see Him. What is essential is invisible to the eye. It is only with hearts we can see clearly (When the Well Runs Dry By-:Fr. Thomas H. Green). Sometimes we are spiritually blind that we don’t see God who is walking with us.
Dryness is not really dryness. We feel dry and abandoned because that is the way God treats His friends (St. Theresa of Avila). At times, Lord may permit desolations to test our worth and the progress we have made, says St. Ignatius of Loyola. “For this is that by experience, they may learn their own weakness and the need they have of the divine help to keep them from falling” (The Love of God in Practice). Therefore, we should not be afraid. It is only in God alone we can find rest. St. Augustine had these beautiful words long ago, “Our hearts are restless until they find rest in you God.”
God is walking with us in our darkness. He never abandons us; “God is faithful, and he never will not let you be tested beyond your strength” (I Cor. 10:15). And “…has anyone trusted in the Lord and been disappointed” (Sir. 2:10). Jesus himself went through this darkness and abandonment. “Christ suffered for us, leaving us an example that we should follow in his footsteps” (I Peter 2:21).
Unless we deny our self and take up the cross, we cannot become his followers (Mt. 16:24). It is thru dryness and suffering, we grow closer and closer to God. We should never grow weary, even if our hearts run dry. It is a clear sign of God’s love for us because “He permits His loved ones to be tired that they may gain more merit on this earth and glory in heaven” (The Love of God in Practice). Therefore, the darkness and dryness are blessings from God. They draw us near and dear to God.
“The ultimate proof is to go to the dry well oneself and see what wonders the Lord works.”
-Bro. Kasun Dananjaya C.Ss.R